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Message Board > Manly Pandas (Probably NSFW) > Legend of Aeroshimasu: The foolish king and the brutal warrior

June 6, 2011, 14:46
Dennis
どこかにいる
2092 posts

As the bright sun reflected his shield, the mighty warrior jumped down from a cliff. He wore a broadsword, a leather armor, leather leggings and leather battle boots. Taking out his sword he slayed two Ganeli who were pursuing him. With roaring metallic sound both Ganeli fell, smoke coming from their limbs and a roar of death followed, their red eyes dimming. Catching his breath, he thought to himself:
"How did those forsaken beings enter the forest of Timbor? They have entered the land of Malderon without allowance! They couldn't have bypassed the security. It's impossible. I must warn King Inxsivixk at once, as long my name is Herslexciopheth."

And thus Herslexciopheth departed tot he castle of Malderon. At the entrence were two guards.
"Halt! What is thy name?"
"It's me, Herslexciopheth, I come for urgent matters and must see Inxsivixk at once! Now let me through!"
impressed of Herslexciopheth's loud voice, the guards let him through to see the king!
"Ah", mumbled the King wisely, "It's Inxsivixk!"
"No, my name is Herslexciopheth, YOU are Inxsivixk, you fucking dickhead!"
"I'm so sorry my liege", said the king and bowed for the mighty warrior.
"Apology accepted", said Herslexciopheth.
"Ganeli entered Malderon", continued Herslexciopheth!
"What? THey are here? In this castle??", said the king, surprised.
Herslexciopheth slapped him in his face.
"NO!" he yelled.
"But they are in the lands, seeking terror. How did they pass security?"
"Hmm, they must have guessed our password for entering the land." he whispered, then raising his voice real loud yelling: "Oh! I made the password 'Let me through' so I wouldn't forget so easily. They must've guessed it."
Herslexciopheth kicked the shit out of the king.
"What kind of shit password is that?!" yelled Herslexciopheth while kicking the king's ribs.
"Please... stop... squearmed the king in pain and shame.".
"Fuck this shit. I'm out of here.", said Herslexciopheth politely.
In the hallway a kid was playing with a balloon. Herslexciopheth kicked the shit out of him.
"Go home! It's dangerous in Malderon." he yelled to the crying kid.
"I'm gonna tell mom!", he screamed!
"Fuck off! You fucking piece of shit. GO HOME! I raped your mother yesterday. She now needs to squad above your ugly face.", he replied politely, "So go! And take this cucumber with you! It will protect you, brave kid!", and Herslexiopheth smiled. The kid looked terrified and consued, so ran away.

At the end of the hallway was a window and as Herslexciopheth looked through the window he saw the bitter smoke at the horizon. The war against the Ganeli has started. Herslexciopheth sharpened his blade.
"All of them shall die." He said idiotically staring to a wall.

"Herslexciopheth! Herslexciopheth!"
herslexciopheth looked up!
"Oh.. Hello...", said Herslexiopheth.
It was his best friend. All Malderon people had difficult names with many consonants in it. But hisn friend only had 2 consonants in his name, making his name much easier!
"So...", said Herslexiopheth, "How are you doing lately, my best Gnoeioeioei"
"You must leave quickly, or the fearsome Peemle will attack. The giant Peemle WILL attack!".
"Good heavens", said Herslexciopheth, "We must save our souls"
Herslexciopheth ran through the hallway, pushing aside every woman and child he encounterd. One of the women fell with her face in a meat grinder.
"Rhaaaaaaaaaaa!" she yelled, while her face was ripped to pieces and her daughter cried "mommy mommy".
But before Herslexciopheth could escape, Gnoeioeioei died dramatically. He got shot in the head by a Ganeli.
"PWN" said Herslexcipheth and suddenly he laughed his ass off. Then he realized he was on an important mission, so he ran forward. THIS! IS! MALDERON! He yelled, and he killed 5 chidlren and 3 women with one sweep of his blade. One Ganele got injured by his blade.
"Not bad, Ganele!" He said, grinning. Herslexiopheth used his blade and thrusted it into the Ganele. Out of a Ganeli disguise fell King Inxsivixk, crying in pain with a deadly wound.
"what the fuck?" said Herslexiopheth!
"YOU... IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled at the king.
The king was crying, but the next moment he got decapitated by a monkey.

"Time to die!", the monkey said.
"Shit... we lost the war.", said Herslexiopheth, and he killed himself.

And so, mankind was finally destroyed. The earth was back like many centuries ago as in the beginning of the 21st century: Ruled by apes and controlled by machines.

.....


Some History background (not necessary but interesting):

Malderon's king Inxsivixk is the second king. It is a country on the continent of Aeroshimasu. There are 3 important countries in Aeroshimasu.
- Malderon: Human-populated kingdom
- Ramabumba: Apes-populated KingKongdom
- xtrf-938T-Beta: Called Ganelia by humans. Populated with Ganeli, cyborgs who are a mix of werewolves, machines and insects. Some have a brain and some have a replaced AI. The AI ones are less performant in hunting for food. Ganeli are the arch enemy of humans and are neutral with Ramabumbians.

Before the three countries it was the Old Republic of Aeroshimasu... until a not-very-wise -but-clever-man invented machines that could absorb life energy from all kinds of primates. Legend says he died from being his own test subject. It was later that his facility had its own brain and created the fearsome Querysql, a God you must fear.

It is ironically that before the Old Republic there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there were also 3 countries that reunited, and before that it was one country as well, and before that there was just nothing.
____________
Kwakkel
#
June 10, 2011, 22:24
PB
Defender of the faith
630 posts

The giant Peemle WILL attack!
____________
#
June 30, 2011, 15:17
Zosma
Senior Procrastinator
99 posts

Dennis, I don't know what you've been smoking, but this is the best story I've read in a while.
____________
Fuck a duck
#
July 5, 2011, 10:40
Dennis
どこかにいる
2092 posts

Who wants a sequel?

Reply if you want a sequel.

[Edited on July 6, 2011 by Dennis]
____________
Kwakkel
#
July 5, 2011, 22:24
PB
Defender of the faith
630 posts

The giant Peemle WILL attack!
____________
#
July 6, 2011, 15:52
Dennis
どこかにいる
2092 posts

I edited my post, and since it has no timestamp (only a date stamp) I can hereby announce that PB replied before my edit. No one can prove it. So because PB was so nice to ask for a sequel. The sequel will come sooner than the attack of the giant Peemle.
____________
Kwakkel
#
July 6, 2011, 21:39
PB
Defender of the faith
630 posts

You do not want to mess with the giant Peemle, they can be quite persistent.
____________
#
July 12, 2011, 15:23
Dennis
どこかにいる
2092 posts

who's "they", Flanders ?
____________
Kwakkel
#
July 12, 2011, 22:51
PB
Defender of the faith
630 posts

I thought the Peemle where the people of the Peen tribe?
____________
#
July 13, 2011, 17:37
Dennis
どこかにいる
2092 posts

No the Peemle is a giant, as said in the text :)

The giant (called) Peemle.
____________
Kwakkel
#
November 22, 2018, 23:24
PB
Defender of the faith
630 posts

It didn't attack though, because mankind was destroyed 👀
____________
#
April 3, 2019, 15:19
Dennis
どこかにいる
2092 posts

You are correct ! But in the end the good will always win from evil as long we open our hearts to each other.
____________
Kwakkel
#

Message Board > Manly Pandas (Probably NSFW) > Legend of Aeroshimasu: The foolish king and the brutal warrior

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